It has been revealed that the $1 billion dollars spent on building Parliament House has been entirely wasted after experts discovered the startling fact that owls actually live in trees, or burrows, and do not live in houses at all.
Built in 1988, Parliament House in Canberra was designed for housing all of Australia’s nine species of owls in one place.
“Yes, it seems obvious now,” laughed a scientist who has been studying owls for decades. “Houses are pretty much just meant for humans and cockroaches. And, if you’re lucky, huntsman spiders. Definitely not for groups of owls.”
“This changes everything,” said one of the architects of Parliament House. “Now, contrary to the initial intent, Parliament House is for ‘politicians’, a collective noun for a group of asses. These are people who don’t have anything better to do than sit around sexting staffers, making thinly veiled racist statements, rorting travel allowances or playing Pokemon. That’s definitely not what we had in mind when we designed it,” he stated.
“The hardest work most of them have ever done was trying to decipher what the heck Malcolm Roberts was saying,” he added. “And there’s a few of them who think climate change is only real when the air-conditioning stops working during question time.”
“What’s the collective noun for a group of unemployed former government ministers?” he pondered.